Marriage Jokes

I decided recently to start a collection of tidbits that tend to portray marriage in a bad light. I am not married (in fact I'm a single-and-pretending-not-to-be-bitter person), so maybe my discussion of this is flawed. But I think that if marriage was such an important thing in the eyes of such folks as, oh, God the Father, maybe we should respect it a little more too. Remember, these stories are here only because they annoy me.

- Joe, Feb 10, 2001

A dietitian was once addressing a large audience in Chicago. "The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago. Red meat is awful. Soft drinks erode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. Vegetables can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in our drinking water."

"But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all have, or will, eat it. Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?"

A 75-year-old man in the front row stood up and said,

"Wedding cake."